Friday, February 25, 2011

Thoughts from 30,000 feet...

Making changes isn’t easy.   This is especially true when you are surrounded by various forms of chaos.   While one could argue that having a full plate and a tight deadline is invigorating – and back in college I might have been tempted to agree – now it’s more frustrating than anything.    It’s week two of Mommyfit2011 and I’m committed to this wonderful opportunity that Urban Mommies and Total Body Revolution have gifted me with.   Having your workouts and meals all set out for you sure does take some of the pressure off – when you’re home.  But when you are travelling things get a little bit challenging.
I’ve been away for four days this week.  Yes, with portable dvd player in hand I’ve attempted to do what I can for the workouts.  And yes, I’ve been careful about what I eat, making the best choices I can.  But it’s a bit crazy trying to follow my plan when I’m on the other side of the country limited to the food choices in the cafeteria and without the tools to do some of the workouts in the plan.  I’ve decided I can look at these past four days as a big fat failure (after all I wasn’t perfect – I did eat some jello, a rollo and another small treat  - all not planned!) or I could look at it as finding my ability to move forward when facing speedbumps.  I think I’d prefer to see it as the latter.   
When looking for the silver lining, I realized that my coworkers were showing me such incredible support – praising what I’ve accomplished so far since I began my journey in January – doubly praising me for staying so committed to the TBR program out there even when it was tough, and letting me whine when I could barely walk up the stairs or get in and out of my chair due to the pain in my thighs.  That one they thought was pretty funny I’m sure.   My husband was a great coach on the sidelines via the telephone as he encouraged me to do something, anything, even though I didn’t much feel like it.  And I still managed to work out some and eat well despite the fact that I had a cold, was messed up by the change in timezones and was living out of my own safe environment.    I even reached out to those I didn’t know to share what I was doing with the Mommyfit2011 challenge and I left with well wishes from strangers who had become something more over the course of our stay.  Hey – the more people you’d let down by failing, the harder you try!  And I’ve decided that I am one of those people I’d let down by not doing my absolute best.
It’s easy to give up and go back to bad habits when you don’t feel safe, but if you stretch just that little bit out of your comfort zone, you make progress.   If you make progress, no matter how small, it’s a positive thing.   Changing my way of thinking from condemning my mistakes to acknowledging my human side is one of the things I want to accomplish this year.  This gentle way of learning to love the ‘me’ness of me is just as important as learning to love and care for this body I’ve been given.  After all, just like my writing, I’m work in progress, too. 
Things don’t get easier when I come home – with a funeral tomorrow, a new baby to visit on Saturday, a child’s birthday party on Sunday, the renovation in progress on our home, and the general chaos around our home lately, it’s likely to be just as challenging.  I’m thinking all I can do is take it one day at a time, taking those babysteps to reach my goals.  All I have to do is remember life’s like that – a never ending series of big and little speedbumps along the way that challenge my mind, touch my heart, and push my body to it’s limit from time to time.   And that’s ok – Living the incredibly blessed and beautiful life I have is more than worth it.   
Next stop – my bed … and the alarm set so that I don’t miss my morning workout!

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